Category Archives: Writing

The Fault in Our Stars

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The Fault in Our StarsThe Fault in Our Stars by John Green
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

“Sometimes, you read a book and it fills you with this weird evangelical zeal, and you become convinced that the shattered world will never be put back together unless and until all living humans read the book.”

Interesting, this quote from The Fault in Our Stars may just some up how I feel.

It is about cancer, but almost incidentally. It’s about pain, suffering, and the human condition. It’s about the idea of oblivion and existence and meaning. It’s about the reason we’re here and what we should do with the time we’re given.

It’s honest. Candid. Relevant.

I don’t know how to go on without being pretentious or spoiling the plot. Please read it. I can’t promise you’ll enjoy all of it. But it’s the kind of book that makes you question assumptions. It takes you back to first being in love, first seeing death, first questioning the universe. I think the world would be an infinitely better place if we all revisited those moments, free from the irony of blase eyes. Look at the world unfiltered.

*This is straight from my Goodreads account because I don’t know if I could write another review without crying. It really is a wonderful read!

View all my reviews

My Lethologica Love

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*This was an idea for one of the letters in my novel, but it didn’t quite match the flow of the rest of the book. I really enjoyed though so I wanted to share. Enjoy! 😀

Sometimes I wonder if you’re real- if we’re real. I mean you could easily be something I dreamed up in boredom or loneliness or sadness. And by you, I don’t mean the physical, tangible you who was born in September and is allergic to the nightshade family. I mean the you I’m in love with.

Yes, love. That overused word that is supposed to express the strongest of all human emotions (except for hate, but that’s a different story). I love you, or at least a facsimile.

The you I’m in love with shares many traits with the real you. He’s a skinny beanpole with ulotrichous hair. He’s loud, opinionated, and sometimes obnoxious. More than anything, he wants to have fun.

But there are differences too. Like the fact that the you I’m in love with loves me back. Sometimes he sends me silly notes for no reason at all. He sees “us” as a possibility, not an abstract concept. And I know that’s not real.You don’t think like that.

I wonder if I’m being ridiculous. Probably. And it’s even worse that I wish you were being ridiculous too.

Sometimes I see it, like dust mites that appear suspended in the light of the fading sun. We lock eyes and suddenly nothing else matters. We banter back and forth. We laugh at the same jokes. But it’s sphallolalia. All light and no substance, gone as soon as you blink.

Your love is lygerastiac. It’s in the dark, quiet moments. Would it take so very much to make it grow? Or would it shrivel and die in the sight of the world?

But then I remember that’s not really you. That’s the you I’m in love with. Maybe it’s something that I want so badly that I turn you into what you’re not. That isn’t fair- to you or me.

My heart is filipendous, and sooner or later it’s going to fall. Illusions shatter with time and paper love burns in the fires of reality. I’ll let go before I get hurt and leave you with your autolatry love. We’ll both be better off.

A Witzelsucht Post

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It’s true that hippopotomanstroesequipedalian speech can make you sound inaniloquent at best and mumpsimus or philosophuncilist at worst. Still, I had to share this definition: Zielschmerz n. the exhilarating dread of finally pursuing a lifelong dream, which requires you to put your true abilities out there to be tested on the open savannah, no longer protected inside the terrarium of hopes and delusions that you created in kindergarten and kept sealed as long as you could, only to break in case of emergency. This is how I feel.

College Bliss

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Hello! I’m in this super mode. I’m doing homework, listening to music, interacting via social network, blogging, AND reading. I feel so on top of things.

This is in part due to my extreme caffeine consumption and part due to returning home from an extremely inspiring class.

As this is the first week of the new term at my school, I’ll probably remain driven for about another week or two.

Today is also awesome because I

  • Got “Paper Towns” by John Green in the mail. As some of you may know, this is one of my favorite books. Period. If you do choose to read it (and you should!), please note that it has mature themes and language.  Just so you know…
  • Picked up “Maphead” by Ken Jennings and “Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children” by Ransom Riggs from the library. Super excited! I’ll let you know my opinion when I’m done.
  • Spent some time with my good friend Jess.
  • Watched a bit of BBC’s “Sherlock”
  • Took a nap
  • Watched the sun set

And more. There were bad things, but I’d say this was a fairly good day. I’d give it 7/10, so 70% good.

How is life going for you? Is school/work/home giving joy or causing heartbreak?

See you sooner rather than later!

side-note: I’m doing a daily vlog throughout January here if you’re interested.

What if…

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Have you ever been in love? (I think that’s the opening to a song by Toy Box…) It’s fine if you haven’t. I don’t know if I have. I think that I’ve felt like I was in love, but I doubt it was real.

I’ve always dreamed of this perfect happily ever after ending. There’s always a Prince Charming. He doesn’t save me and I don’t save him. In a way, we save each other, or make each other better.

That’s the dream. But what if…

What if we were honest with ourselves about the plausibility of dreams? Would that make the world a better place? I doubt it. Isn’t it beautiful to know that dreams can come true outside of Disney movies? Isn’t that something to hope for? And ultimately, hope is everything

What if I (or you 🙂 ) stopped looking for Prince Charming and started working on becoming a Princess worth having?

Sometimes, I do worry that we spend so much time looking for a soul mate that we do nothing to improve ourselves. This doesn’t mean that we should change to meet someone’s expectations. But as people, there are always areas that we could use improvement in. for me, it’s attitude.

What if we realized that our One True Love may not come in the package  we’ve been expecting? For me, this might mean that he’s into baseball (yuck!) and not literature. Dreaming is good. Dreaming at the expense of reality…not so much.

I often ask myself “What if the person you belonged with was right in front of you? Would you recognize them or look right through them?”

What is this thing called love that we all obsess over???? 🙂

This is a topic I will visit over and over again, simply because it both fascinates and puzzles me. And yes, my mind is already on Valentine’s Day ❤

 

My Novel

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Confession time:  I never had a plan for my novel from NaNoWriMo. I never created an outline, did a free write, anything. It was completely written based on whatever popped into my head.

And that worked for a little over 50,000 word. But now I feel lost. I’m not sure where I want this story to go. I mean, I have some idea of the ending I’d ideally want. What I’m less sure about is how to actually write it in a way that is conclusive, makes sense, is actually connected to the rest of the novel, and isn’t too trite or cliched.

I feel strongly that this novel could turn out to be at least decent. It needs some serious editing though. And oh yeah, I should probably actually finish it.

Sigh #writerproblems

Oh also… as much as I loved your comments and insight, I’ve deleted my NaNoWriMo posts. There’s some speculative talk about independent publishing (granted I finish  it) and I don’t want there to be copyright issues. 😦

 

 

 

Happy New Year

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English: Two New Year's Resolutions postcards

Image via Wikipedia

 

I’m not one for New Year’s Resolutions. However, I’m all for to-do lists. They’re what keep me organized. So here’s a list of some of the things I want to accomplish in 2012. I’d love to read yours

 

  • To get started, I’m doing the Try Something New Revolution through the UK’s Channel 4. Everyday, I have to complete a challenge and I plan to vlog about it. To stay up to date, you can follow me at youtube.com/ifimjuliet.
  • I want to blog at least once a week. Because I miss you.
  • Also, BEDA. Need this be said?
  • Finish editing 2011’s NaNoWriMo
  • Do NaNoWriMo this year
  • Complete my submission to Less Than Three
  • Read at least 50 books. Reviews to be posted here.
  • Watch 100 movies. I’ll post the reviews on this blog, if I feel the movies deserve reviews.
  • Make a black and white silent film.
  • Keep my 4.0 college GPA.
  • Do Drawctober
  • Make a top 5 college list by February (I’m a high schooler attending a community college, so I’ll need to transfer after next year)
  • SAT!
  • Help decrease world suck. Every year, I choose an organization to volunteer with. I haven’t chosen one yet..
  • Take a kickboxing class
  • Learn how to do a backflip. I only recently learned how to front flip, but I want to try!
  • Meet John and Hank Green (and the Katherine!). I’m going o the local stop of the Tour de Nerdfighteria courtesy of my dear friend Caitlin (she of the Green Applesauce fame).

That gives you an idea. I tend to be overly ambitious.

 

Happy Halloween!

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When I had pepperoni for breakfast, that was a sign that today would be an interesting day.

Let’s see… Trick or treating with my best friend, wearing too much eye liner, eating pizza, cerebrating my grandmere’s birthday, and watching YouTube with my neighbor/adopted brother.

Tomorrow starts NaNoWrimo or, as it’s more popularly known, the death of my social life. Traditionally, my blogging suffers as a result. But this year, I think I have a solution.

What if I post my 1,666 daily words on here each day? It would keep me blogging, keep my focused on NaNoWriMo, and just be awesome.

Would this be annoying? Opinions required…please. 🙂

More Poetry

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So, for those of you who don’t know, I often think in poetry. (I can also have entire conversations in iambic pentameter so…) Basically, what this translates to is a notebook full of poems that may or may not be relevant to anyone, including myself. But through the magic of the internet, I now have a place to share my work and victims…er readers to enjoy it. Bwahahahahaha. So without further ado, a poem:

I love the way you smirk when I say “Perhaps”

It’s a lapse in my reason, treason to my heart

Starting a revolution, full of convolutions, pollution

Of my freedom, ending a reign of sending suitors flying

Replying, “I’m better off alone.”

 

I love the way you expertly play at my heart-strings

Ringing them like a bell. I’m no hard sell, I’m gone

Belonging to you wholly, lulling my mind

Into kind thoughts of mankind, a blindness I despise

And realizing the double face I’ve placed over

The common sense I held dear.

 

You’re a sore boring into the core of me.

Is it a tragedy, this strange malady claiming me?

No turning back. I lack rearview mirrors. And tears

Pour from my eyes, a surprise when you know

The passionate joy within.

Good-bye

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Smile. Please do.

It’s a lovely little interlude

From what I have to say

 

Kiss- the granting of a wish

A lovely moment I will miss

As I slip away.

 

Dear, you know

How very apropos

Our story is.

 

Love. It isn’t so.

And we both know

I can’t stay.

 

Good-bye.

Don’t you dare cry.

It’s better this way.

 

Please believe

The greatness you can achieve

A legacy born to pain

 

Adieu!