Category Archives: Random

Festina Lente

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So, I love the arts. I’m especially passionate about literary, performing, and visual arts. Literary arts are my life, and I’ve taken two terms of theater classes. I’m also volunteering with a local theater troupe. But my love for visual arts is a bit more complicated.

I was that kid in kindergarten who refused to color in class because it was “silly”. I haven’t taken a visual art class since middle school. And if you asked someone to describe me, I doubt the words “painter’, “artist” or “the next Van Gogh” would be used.

You see, unlike with theater or lit., I always considered myself bad at visual arts. I loved drawing and painting and shaping clay, but I hated to show my work to others for fear that it would fall short of some invisible standard. I wanted to be the best and I knew that I wasn’t the best at this.

Two things changed my mind, or at least, forced me to reconsider my perspective of what makes good art. The first was a painting of pumpkins I did as a make-up assignment for my middle-school art class. I had been sick and the teacher had told me to create a painting of whatever I wanted in order to get credit. So, I chose pumpkins.

Painting those pumpkins was the first time I felt like I was doing something that wasn’t too weird or bad or incomplete for others to see. And when I turned it in, I felt like da Vinci bestowing a second Mona Lisa.  Obviously it wasn’t, but it’s the first time I remember being proud of a piece of visual art.

The second was when I was doodling in my notebook one day, and my friend looked over and said, “Hey, that’s pretty cool. I wish I could draw like that.” I looked down at my doodle and then up my friend in surprise. I wasn’t working on anything spectacular. I was just drawing interesting lines over and over. And suddenly it dawned on me:

Art isn’t about perfection

In fact, one dictionary defines art simply as a work produced by skill and imagination.

What I was doing was legitimate art, even if it wasn’t likely you’d find in a museum.

My teacher has an expression she likes to use. “Festina lente”, or hurry slowly. I think that one phrase sums up my whole experience with art. It’s been about letting things happen and embracing opportunities. It’s knowing that I’m headed someplace, but still taking time to smell the roses. It’s about art for art’s sake and not in order to please an imaginary critic.

There’s my 5 cents worth. Don’t spend it all at one place! 😛

Things I Like*

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*because I’m tired and lazy and hungry and I can’t have food until I’ve had some tests tomorrow morning.

1.

As a Whovian, I must say, we have the most adorable cast. I don’t care if you’re not a fan of Matt Smith or Karen Gillan. They’re just the cutest individuals alive!

2. I’m working on an abstract art project. This is what the inside of my head looks like:

Cy Twombly's Work Space

3. Speaking of art…

A palette…of CUPCAKES!!!! (Did I mention that I’m hungry? 😛 )

4. I read this great essay called How to Do What You Love by Paul Graham. It’s inspiring but still realistic. As someone who is still searching for her purpose in life (at least career-wise), it was amazingly comforting.

5.  Can I preface this by saying that I’m not a fan of Glee? I mean, if you like Glee, good for you! But it’s just not my thing. However, I am most definitely a fan of Darren Criss, as I’m sure I’ve mentioned in the past. So, this cover of Gotye’s “Somebody That I Used to Know” is something that I very much enjoyed. I like how the song is turned from being about lovers to being about two brothers who no longer get along. (I still like the original best, I think)

6. Guys, I made a human heart!

Yes, this has to do with the aforementioned art project.

7.  I cannot recommend Leaves of Grass by Walt Whitman highly enough. It’s one of the best collections of poetry I’ve ever read. Not every piece is mind blowing, but oh so many are.

Like…

And you, O my Soul, where you stand,
Surrounded, surrounded, in measureless oceans of space,
Ceaselessly musing, venturing, throwing,—seeking the spheres, to connect them;
Till the bridge you will need, be form’d—till the ductile anchor hold;
Till the gossamer thread you fling, catch somewhere, O my Soul.

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Tell me if this is a normal person thing or just a weird me thing. I’m not really sure.

Do you guys ever fall in love with an idea? I mean, hardcore, heart in your mouth, butterflies in your stomach, nervous, sweaty in love with an idea?

Does it become some kind of driving force behind your thoughts, a kind of background music to your day? Is it something that you just can’t shake, something that seems to bubble up from inside of you? And, even though it’s crazy, you find that this idea is on par with food, water, and shelter when it comes to the list of things you need to survive?

It’s not being OCD. It’s not like being on some kind of maniac trip. It’s just this all-abiding passion for one singular idea.

No? Just me? Ok.

Sigh

 

Care to Dance?

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Der Kinderreigen (Children's dances) by Hans T...

This is exactly what I expect Saturday to be like....

Hello! I had classes until almost 6 and then youth group after that. Life is crazy busy sometimes, guys.

So apparently I’m going to a dance on Saturday. This will be interesting. As you may know, I’m in high school but I go to college. I’ve never really had a traditional high school experience, complete with dances, school events, and um…other kids.

However, not all my friends are as nontraditional. I mean, sure, most of them go to the local art school, but that’s still much more traditional than my education.

Anyways, one of my friends found himself without a date and asked me if I’d be his fallback. And I said yes. I’m just nice, I guess. 😛

It’s “Spring Fling” with a beach theme. From what I can figure, spring fling is semi-formal, not super-dressed-up formal. Which is nice. But I’m still a bit befuddled about finding something to wear. One of my friends has offered me the use of a sundress that sounds perfect. So that’s good and stuff…

Ahhhhhh, I’ve never been to a dance. I mean, I’ve been asked but things have always kept me from going. I don’t even dance particularly well!!! The good news is, I have a lot of friends at this school so that should be fun. The bad news is, 2 of my 3 nemeses also attend this school (my other nemesis works at a theater and has a very distinctive voice…it’s complicated.) Betcha didn’t know I had not one but 3 nemeses, did you? :O

Have you ever been to a dance? Was it a good experience? Bad experience? Do you have any advice? Let me know in the comments!

I have to go read “The Hobbit” now (for school!!!! Yay!!!!), so I’ll ttyl.

 

Sporadic (Slightly Philosophical) Thoughts

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Ok… 1, 2,  3 GO!

  • da Vinci believed the greatest source of inspiration for artists was cracks in the wall. (Yes, was not were. I know my grammar 😛 )
  • Elrond from the Lord of the Rings series is only half elf according to The Hobbit
  • Why is the plural of mouse mice? I mean, seriously…
  • While I’m asking questions, why do fools fall in love? 🙂
  • If were a color, I’d be blue
  • Mankind is the only creature who wastes life asking what the meaning of life is.
  • How would one paint with all the colors of the wind?
  • Carl Sagan once said that to make an apple pie from scratch, one must first make the universe.
  • Looking through my music makes me feel like a hipster.
  • Ending doesn’t always lead to beginning or vice versa.

Tonight is one of those nights when I’m thinking of everything and nothing. My brain is like a sea of scattered thoughts. That sentence fills my whole quota for pretentious similes. Blah

It may be because I’m  young or stressed or both but I find myself flitting back and forth between the serious and the ridiculous. The concept of settling on either side doesn’t seem to have occurred to me.

Hello

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Deutsch: Portrait Beethovens mit der Partitur ...

I’m sorry for missing the last two days. I’m just… stressed. Doing this 17 credits thing is already overwhelming. It’s crushing my SOOOUUUUUULLLL!!!!!! And cue Beethoven’s 5th Symphony.

Speaking of  Beethoven’s 5th, at 12, when I still believed I was God’s gift to the song-writing world, I actually wrote lyrics for the first 35 seconds of that symphony. And to apologize for missing two days of BEDA, I will share those lyrics with you:

Looking at you, looking at me

Wondering if this is the end of all I see

Hoping that maybe one day I will be free

But when I think I’m on the brink

It all caves in on me

Is this the end?

Have I no friend who will spend their life with me?

Is my enemy the only one I’ll ever see?

Seeing his face, my heart does race

Goes a pace that makes me feel my head begin to reel

in a whirl it twirls

The sad thing is, for years I actually thought I had improved this masterpiece through the addition of my lyrics. *Shakes head in embarrassment at younger self.

 Is all forgiven? Yes? No? Maybe?

  Good! (or bad…)

  c u tmrow 4 rlz!

TV-Style Break-Up

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I haven’t ever been through a bad TV-style break-up. If you’ve ever watched a chick flick or any show that you can find by randomly clicking through channels, you know what I’m referring to.

A guy and girl will be dating and they are perfect together. Then suddenly, one or the other (usually the guy) will arrange a dinner/date/outing and then break the news that they’re no longer interested in their boyfriend/girlfriend. If the dumped person is a guy, then TV states that he will mourn by playing video games, withdrawing from society, clubbing (usually forced to go by a well-intentioned friend) and/or long walks by himself. If the person is a woman, however, she will respond by sobbing, eating unusually high amounts of carbs, watching sappy movies, listening to sad music, or some combination of these.

I’m not claiming that this necessarily represents reality. Although it might. Like I said, I’ve never been through a bad break-up. At most, I might be sad for a while. I think I cried once. But no romantic relationship that I have ever been in has been so

important to me that its termination would lead to a sorrow-and-ice-cream induced state of comatose. There are things that would trigger such a scenario, though. These include (in no particular order):

  • Cancellation of a favorite TV show
  • Listening to certain songs (An example, much to my everlasting shame, is “Please Don’t Leave Me” by P!nk. I know, I hate me too)
  • Watching certain movies (Old Yeller, Toy Story 3, Casablanca, Serenity etc.)
  • Any major fight with someone I’m close to.
  • Watching certain TV episodes [“The Reichenbach Fall” (Sherlock), “Doomsday” (Doctor Who), “The Lady of the Lake”  (Merlin)etc.]
  • Pretty much anything Rose/Doctor or Daniel/Vala related. Yes, I ship fictional couples with an enthusiasm that is quite sad from an objective point of view.
  • On a particularly emotional day, certain books have this effect.

And more, I’m sure.

The whole reason I’m writing this is that I feel like I’ve just been through a TV-style break-up. And I have a cold 😦 Sigh… oh well. Cue the ice cream, ridiculous movies, and Kleenex.

(I think I may have already posted something similar to this… 😛 )

Is this a normal thing? Do you ever have this feeling? I don’t think that I’m alone in this. I’d love it if you’d comment with what triggers TV-style break-up symptoms for you. Maybe we’ll have some in common!

See ya tomorrow!