Category Archives: About Me/ the blog


Hello! Once again, this is not your regular writer. Clearly. That’s what you were told would happen. And you believe everything you’re told on the Internet, don’t you? You silly people. I bet you conspiracy theorist hipster hippies think that tomatoes are fruits.

Today I’ve been instructed to wow all of you with my ability to blog about things. The thing is, I’ve never really blogged before. This is an awfully large amount of responsibility to put on me all at once. I might cave under the pressure. What if I don’t do a good job? What if I make an embaresing spelling mistake? It’s just horrable. It’s also 7 AM, a rather ungodly hour if you ask me. I think it’s fair to say that no one should ever be awake at a time like this. We’re supposed to wake up in the morning, and everyone knows that AM stands for ‘Almost Morning,’ so why would we want to be early to our date with consciousness? Savor your unconscious states as if they were fluffy baby seals that wanted nothing more than to stare at you cutely and love you… Before having someone yank them from you and club their brains out.

An astute analogy, I think, though a grim one. But for an adolescent, when is waking up at 7 not grim? It throws the whole day wildly off-kilter, and makes for completely unfocused blog posts.

And back on that subject, what on earth is the point of this? I need a point. Points are good. Or a theme. Or maybe even something as specific as a topic of discussion.

Here’s a list of the top five Michael Bay movies:

Huh, that’s weird. Anyway. Did you know that the word “clip” has many meanings, two of which are complete opposites of each other? I can clip things together, and clip them apart. With paperclips, video clips, ammo clips, hedge clippers, hair clippers, or nail clippers. And somewhere in there are clipper ships. But that’s neither here nor there. But if it’s not here, and it’s not there, then where the heck is it? Non-being I suppose, into which my coherency is slowly trickling. This post needs a focus, and fast!

I suppose I could tell you the usual things. Who I am, what I like, what I like to do… My top favorite such and suches… What I plan to do with my day…

Ooh, there’s an idea. What I plan to do with my day. I don’t mean to actually tell you; it’s of no consequence at all. But you should think about this; what do you plan to do with your day? And later, when you’re going to bed, ask yourself, “what did I do with my day?” How do the two deviate, and how often? I’ve found that the quality of life, for oneself and for others, consistently depends on this answer. Sometimes I plan to spend a day doing homework and to be in bed by 11. Most times I spend a day doing nothing, and end up in bed by 4 in the morning. Some people plan to show up to work on time every day so they won’t lose their jobs. Some plan to show up to their kids’ birthday parties. Some plan to stop smoking. Some plan to start jogging. Some plan to go into their owners’ bedrooms and pee on their backpacks right before they need to go to school.

That last one may or may not have been my wonderful pet puppy dog whom I love dearly and have no intention whatsoever of strangling.


I got sidetracked again. And I forgot what my point was. I guess I could scroll up and reread it, but what’s the point? I still don’t know what it was. Oh well. Did you know that Steven King, John Grisham, and James Patterson all publish around 2 new books every year? WTF. Who has that kind of time? Hippies, no doubt. And who reads all these books?! Communists, of course.

I’m afraid it’s time for me to go, never to return. Maybe. You go live a happy life. And seize the day! Do what you plan to do, plan for what you need to do, and plan for what you want to do. Especially if you’re a dog, and you like having a low life expectancy. If anyone needs me, I’ll be running a new load in the washing machine. Stay tuned for scenes from next episode! Written by a JOSH.

Cohesion is Overrated

Guest Post #1: What’s in a name? This is.


Hey all! As you may have heard, I’m not the usual writer for If I’m Juliet, just a friend who happened to unwittingly post a résumé in the comments and land a position on the newly formed B team of writers. So, the age-old adage stands: “It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.” (As evidenced by my temp job here as a stand-in blogger when I have no real clue I’m doing.)

In lieu of cluttering up this post with an introduction of myself, I’ll just post a link where you can evaluate my credentials and/or find the answers to only the most important details anyone might need to know about me here. —> The Unintentional Job Application

In the aftermath of my surprise employment, I was faced with a crisis rooted deep in the territory of the world wide web: I had to pick a username. Now, if you’ve made your way here, chances are you spend a considerable amount of time on the internet, so you should find this rather relevant… that’s the plan anyway.

This might just be the perfectionism that permeates most aspects of my life, but I see picking out a username as an opportunity to assert my creativity and wit upon the world. But even if you don’t share my particular brand of crazy, using the following advice as a guideline may at least save you the headache of trying to be more original than the millions of name-hunters preceding you on the various websites you encounter, and perhaps some embarrassment if your friends ever happen to check the screen over your shoulder.

Spare us humans the binary code – If your web-bound alter ego goes by princess32121348694131654654498, we can’t be friends. Seriously, that’s just inconsiderate. Numbers are only acceptable in small doses, preferably with some sort of meaning attached to them. No matter how many precious minutes you have to spend concocting permutations of your original effort, just don’t go there.

Use fancy adjectives – I propose this as a replacement for adding the first 100 decimal places of pi to the end of your name. It’s far more interesting and much easier for all parties involved to remember.

Embrace the title you’ve always wished you had – Adding a Mr, Mrs, or Miss to the front of your name is another far cleaner alternative to the distasteful number-adding phenomena. You can use most any label to this effect (Sir, Lady, Humanoid, etc.), so you should find at least one that hasn’t been used already.

Draw inspiration from
Steal ^ the genius of others – Shortened quotes or references to a favorite book, movie, song, or meme add a nice personal touch by displaying a snippet of your interests.

Follow your heart (or wherever it is that emotions happen) – If you’re still searching after applying all of the aforementioned techniques, follow the examples of IHateThinkingOfAUsername and ItsWayPastMyBedtime and channel that frustration you’re sure to be feeling.

And now, a short list of usernames I’ve actually stumbled upon in my journeys across the interweb, so you can see my recommendations in action.

Examples/Hall of Fame:

  • PeanutBudda (Puns: Always recommended in my book.)
  • CanadiansF***YeahSorryAboutTheLanguage (If you’re new to the internet, you should know that it enjoys placing large demographics under broad stereotypes. For example: Citizens of Canada=Polite to a fault.)
  • katherinethe19th (A reference to “An Abundance of Katherines” by John Green of the vlogbrothers.)
  • imthe8thhorcrux (Another literary reference to a series of which you may have heard.)
  • WhoTheEffIsMe (Tribute to the ongoing vlogbrothers joke “Who the eff is Hank?”)
  • SubstituteReality (I believe this was derived from one of my favorite quotes, “I reject your reality and substitute my own.” –Adam Savage, Mythbuster)
  • sparksflyup (Can you tell I love the vlogbrothers? They created this one based on the scripture Job 5:7 “For man is born for trouble, As sparks fly upward.”)
  • kaysyconundrum (Points for alliteration.)
  • LinseytheNerdiest (My, what a lovely and creative title you have there.)
  • IHateThinkingOfAUsername (And how do you feel about that?)
  • ItsWayPastMyBedtime (Looks like the last ditch effort of a bewildered and sleep-deprived individual.)
  • WhatYouOughttoKnow (Definitely validates whatever comments they may leave.)
  •  And my all time favorite… OhLookABandwagon. No explanation needed.

If you still have trouble snagging a moniker and just need someone who relates, Natalie Tran (aka communitychannel) is your friend: click here for a sense of camaraderie (Just a heads up for those of you who dislike profanity, I’d rank this as PG-13 for language.)



Cover of "Mexico (Eyewitness Travel Guide...

I’m going to Mexico.And before you think that this means I will be neglecting you, think again! I have brought in 3 of my lovely friends to entertain you while I’m gone. My guest bloggers are gonna rock your socks! You might not even want me back…


You…you guys will still want me back, right?

Anyways, I know I’m leaving you in good hands. Have fun!

Robyn (ifimjuliet)

I’m happy…


High School Dance: 1941

Today was perfect in a million small ways. I mean, there so much that could have gone better. I wish I’d been more proactive about housework and homework. It was absolutely soaking wet outside. I went to a dance, and wish that I’d have done something I didn’t have the courage to do.

But in another way, I wouldn’t change a thing. Driving to a soccer game in a warm car with rain all around and the sound of jazz enveloping everything and coating it with significance… getting ready for the dance with a group of friends (some new, some old)…actually wearing make-up and painting my nails…having far too much coffee and far too little food…dancing like a maniac, even though I can’t really dance…having my stomach do those stupid flips that prove I’m actually a human with feelings and emotions…driving home and experiencing that sense of camaraderie that makes you feel young and alive in a way few things do…

I think I’m beginning to understand that I’m a senior. I feel so utterly alive, in part because of the coffee and the late hour. But another reason is that I feel awake for the first time in a while. I feel like I’m living my life, not just watching it pass by. And I relish it.

That’s all I’ve got tonight, guys.


47 Random Questions


English: Zelda Sayre at about 18 in dance costume.

My life is busy beyond belief, but I still want to blog. You know what that means…. QUESTIONNAIRE TIME!!!!

  1. My full name- This is the internet, soooo no. My first name’s Robyn though, not Juliet, just FYI.
  2. Zodiac sign- Scorpio, but I’m not really the mystical type
  3. 3 fears- Llamas, elevators, and lack of control.
  4. 3 things I love- Musicals, mud, and the color purple.
  5. 4 turn on’s-  This
  6. 4 turn off’s- ^^^^^^
  7. My best friend- I have a cluster, not just one individual.
  8. Sexual orientation- Heterosexual. Sorry ladies 😛
  9. My best first date- It wasn’t even supposed to be a date, but we ended up getting milkshakes in the middle of a grocery store. It was a blast.
  10. How tall am I?- 5’8 and a half. Yep.
  11. What do I miss?- Believing that growing up meant kissing boys, getting a driver’s license, and going to college.
  12. What time was I born?- Evening, like 8 o’clockish, I think.
  13. Favorite color?- Black, unless you count that as the absence of color. Then purple.
  14. Do I have a crush?- Yep.
  15. Favorite quote- At the moment?”She refused to be bored chiefly because she was not boring.” ~Zelda Fitzgerald
  16. Favorite place- There’s a certain resturant
  17. Favorite food- Stir fry. This is a recent development. Formerly, I would have said lasagna.
  18. Do I use sarcasm?- Never
  19. What am I listening to right now?- A Tour in Italy by Bandaid. It’s ridiculously catchy.
  20. First thing I notice in new people?- Vocabulary
  21. Shoe size?- Why? Do you have a foot fetish, questionnaire?
  22. Eye color- Hazel
  23. Hair color- My friend Max says it’s “dirty blonde”
  24. Favorite style of clothing-A mix between high fashion and the soccer field.
  25. Ever done a prank call?- Yep!
  26. What color underwear…is this a real question? No.
  27. Meaning behind my URL?- See this from two years ago
  28. Favorite movie- It changes constantly, but right now it’s Reality Bites
  29. Favorite song- Again, this is constantly changing, but probably Roll to Me by Del Amitri at this moment. I’m on a 90’s kick.
  30. Favorite band- Possibly The Mountain Goats
  31. How I feel right now- Tired
  32. Someone I love- Josh. I love Josh.
  33. My current relationship status- Perpetually single 😛
  34. My relationship with my parents- Complicated. Just don’t bring up spoons or windows…
  35. Favorite holiday- Which ever is next. That means it’s currently Halloween!
  36. Tattoos and piercings I have – My ears are pierced.
  37. Tattoos and piercings I want- None. There’s little that could convince me that I need more needles in my life.
  38. The reason I started blogging- It’s cliched, but I wanted to be heard. I like writing and can only take so much approval from my mother.
  39. Last book I read?- The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky
  40. Do I ever get “good morning” or “good evening” texts?- Occasionally
  41. Have I ever kissed the last person I texted?- It was my classmate Gloria, so…no.
  42. When did I last hold hands?- Friday, I think?
  43. How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?- Maybe 15 minutes.
  44. Have I shaved my legs in the last three days?- Um, I actually don’t know…
  45. Where am I right now?- At home, exhausted.
  46. If I was drunk and unable to stand, who’d be taking care of me?- Usually I’d say my friend Jess, but if I’m drunk…she probably is too! So I’ll go with Nate, my poor neighbor/surrogate brother.
  47. Do I like my music at a loud or reasonable level?- Define “reasonable”.

You know far more than you ever wanted to about me. But in the interest of fairness, if you answer the survey and link it in the comments, I pinkie promise to not only read it, but to leave a comment of my own. Deal?




I have little patience. Concentration is a challenge, and waiting rooms are nothing short of torture.  I pace when I’m thinking, I doodle in class, and I tap my foot when it takes too long for someone to come to the point. Inactivity is my Kryptonite. I share the “I want it NOW!” attitude of much of my generation.

Every once in a while, though, I’ll find something worth waiting for. In such cases, my patience is endless. I’ll keep waiting for something I should have given up long ago.

Right now, I’m in one of my waiting periods. I’ve found something that I want desperately. So I wait. And I’ll admit there’s a part of me that wants to burst into action, to do something. But it’s one of those cases where action would case more harm than good.

It’s so hard! There’s a little voice screaming at me, telling me that inactivity is passivity. A wiser, calmer voice reminds me of all the times I acted when I should have just sat down. It plays memory after memory of me running my mouth, doing the wrong thing, or causing damage that could have been avoided if I’d just given myself time to let emotion cool.  I’m such a passionate person that I tend to regret what I say in the heat of the moment.

And it’s not as though I’ve done nothing. If this whole situation were chess, I’ve done the equivalent of placing my opponent’s king in check. Now I just have to wait for their next move, and that’s the difficult part.

September was an emotional month, and so far, October seems to be following suit. To lighten the mood, here are my (unedited) journal entries from the past two days:

Oct. 1, 2012

OMG! It’s OCTOBER!!!! How????? I don’t even know…. So you can see, I am a deep individual.

Oct. 2, 2012

I’m shrouded in a cloud of apathy. Bleh.


I know, right? My journal is the most unintelligent piece of writing I have ever had the misfortune of reading (or writing, for that matter!). But I have a theory that if I get out all my bad writing in my journal, then my writings here and for school will be nothing short of literary gems.

Yep.  See you soon.

High School


This is going to be a life blog. I do not apologize.*

This summer, I began asking myself what I wanted to remember about high school. Those of you who have been here a while or who know me IRL are aware of the fact that I’ve never attended a “normal” high school. For my freshman and sophomore years, I went to a cooperative school. But last year (my junior year), I began taking all my classes at a local community college. So, this year is both my senior year of high school and my sophomore year in college. I guess you could say that I haven’t had the most typical of high school experiences.

I mean, I have attempted to “experience” all the things kids my age experience (No, Mom, that doesn’t mean sex, drugs, and alcohol…). I’ve played sports for my local school, gone to dances (ok, one dance),and  cheered at homecoming games. The cool thing, though, is that I am in the unique position of shaping what my personal experience looks like.

For me, high school will remind me of seeing my first Broadway show (“Memphis”) or the time I went to a six hour concert showcasing local artists or being able to intern for credit at my college’s theater department. I’ll think of meeting the Vlogbrothers and Tom Milsom and Raven Zoe. I’ll laugh at the memory of the time I went for a walk in the snow at midnight, dressed in footie pajamas and a kola hat, with two of my best friend or staying up all night to marathon Doctor Who or Buffy. High school will be where I broke a boy’s heart for the first time and where another boy kept breaking mine. It will be the time of my life where I left the country for the first time, pushed myself to actually make friends, and discovered a love for Nutella.

I have the rare privilege of being able to plan my own graduation. When I first started high school, the song at the top of this post would have seemed the most appropriate song to play at the ceremony. Everything was embarrassing. But as I found my footing, I realized that the fact I was embarrassed was good. It meant that I hadn’t allowed myself to stagnate. I was out doing things. The last thing that I want is to look back on my own life and realize that I’ve been a spectator.

I’m reaching the point where I’m in a state of perpetual nostalgia. 🙂


*lies. I feel awful when I life blog.

What Even Is This?


“When you experience uncertainty, you are on the right path – so don’t give it up. You don’t need to have a complete and rigid idea of what you’ll be doing next week or next year, because if you have a very clear idea of what’s going to happen and you get rigidly attached to it, then you shut out the whole range of possibilities.”

– Deepak Chopra

  My world is shifting in so many ways. This isn’t a complaint, just a statement of fact. I’m a senior in high school AND in my second year of college.  Dynamics with old friends are completely different. There are new friends I never saw coming. And I doubt freshman me with her Jane Austen, braids, and mousy demeanor would even recognize senior me with her brazen attitude, pixie cut, and Walt Whitman.

I’m working through the agonizing process of deciding where to transfer. There’s one school in particular that interests me…and it’s on the other side of the country. Part of me feels like that’s a good thing. I feel ready to severe my old ties and start new ones, to find myself, to go in pursuit of my Great Perhaps. But quite recently, there have been some changes that have made me consider whether leaving is such a good idea. There’s an opportunity to share a house with friends, a good scholarship from a local school, and yes, there is a boy.

I’m at the point where movies like Lost in Translation and Reality Bites seem surprisingly relevant and watching the prom and graduation episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer make me cry. There are moments when I surprise myself with my maturity and others where I behave like a child. I think this is what they call growing up.

Hope you’ve had a great summer and good luck to those of you headed back to school (or already in classes!).

A Return to Summer- Part 1: Books


Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free
Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands
With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves
Let me forget about today until tomorrow

– Bob Dylan, Mr. Tambourine Man

Hello guys! I’m finally out of school. Finals week was crazy on a whole new level. But that’s neither here nor there (untrue. It’s there. In the past. Or something).

Since we last spoke, it has magically become summer. I don’t want to do another Things I Like post after being away for so long, but I do have several things that are quintessentially summer. Some of these things are traditional, ones that have been “summer” to me since I was little. Others are more recent.

Let’s start with books.

When I was little, summer was my time to reread all my favorites. Now that I’m older, it’s more of a time to read books I haven’t had time to get to. Here’s a sampling of my summer reading.


Little Women by Louisa May Alcott- This is one of my favorite “growing up” books. The sisters in the story remind me so much of my own.  A fun read!

Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt- I had never cried while reading a book before this one. It’s not exactly a love story. It’s more like a tale about the question of immortality. This book feels like summer.

Anne of Green Gables by L.M Montgomery- Anne is quite a lot like the elementary version of myself, except for the color of our hair. A delightful book that seems custom-made for reading beneath a tree, apple in hand.

The House at Pooh Corner by A.A Milne- It’s Winne the Pooh! Explore the Hundred Acre Wood, get into scraps, and enjoying being a kid…no matter what your age.

I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith- This book is completely unappreciated. It’s romantic, intelligent, and utterly enjoyable. The heroine is one of my all time favorites.

Anything written by John Green. Seriously. My three favorites are The Fault in Our Stars, Paper Towns, and Looking for Alaska.

This Side of Paradise by F. Scott Fitzgerald- The Great Gatsby is a fantastic book. It really is. But although I loved reading it, I never felt that something, that sense of connection to the story, that I had had those thoughts, lived those moments. This Side of Paradise was completely opposite. It starts out dull. I almost gave up before the end of the first chapter. It gets better. I’m so glad I made the effort to keep reading. As the book goes on,  it began to feel more autobiographical, more genuine. It’s worth the struggle, guys.

To Read

Things I’m reading now/planning to read

Office Girl by Joe Meno

The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand

A Moveable Feast by Ernest Hemingway

Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer
Phantastes by George MacDonald
Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury
And more…

My next post will be summer films I adore. Let me know if this series is something you enjoy, or if it just seems annoying and vapid.

My Love Affair with Shakespeare


List of titles of works based on Shakespearean...

Recently, I started reading The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafon. In the section entitled “The Cemetery of Forgotten Books”, the narrator says:

“…few things leave a deeper mark on a reader than the first book that finds its way into his heart. Those first images, the echo of words we think we have left behind, accompany us throughout our lives and sculpt a place in our memory to which, sooner or later – no matter how many books we read, how many worlds we discover, or how much we learn and forget- we will return.”

 For me, two books are tied for this role. One is The Jungle Book by Rudyard Kipling. The other is Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare.

 I know that you will probably laugh at that. Romeo and Juliet is not my favorite play of Shakespeare’s. I don’t think that it is the love story to end all love stories. But it was the play that first made me realize what people could do with words.

 Unlike the chapter books we read in class, Shakespeare’s words rolled off the tongue. They danced while the chapter books tottered. And as Romeo fell in love with Juliet, I fell in love with the English language.

I’ve read *almost* all of Shakespeare’s plays and all of his sonnets. I own more than 3 different versions of his complete works plus individual copies of some of the plays. I even went to school dressed in a historically accurate Roman stoa in order to give a  book report on Julius Caesar.

In my experience, the two most some responses to Shakespeare are apathy or love. I think it’s clear which side I’m on.