A Conversation with A Friend

Standard

This is what a typical conversation is like in my so-called life. This is not verbatim, but it’s pretty freaking close.

My friend: I think we should pretend you had a horrible breakup so we can have one of those “watch-terrible-chick-flicks-and-eat-tons-of-ice-cream-and-not-feel-guilty” nights.

Me: ….

My friend: what??? we get to have an emotional night, but you get to be the brokenhearted one, ok?

Me: Why I am the heart broken one?

My friend: Because I was the last time.

Me: Ah, we take turns?

My friend: Well I can’t always be brokenhearted, can I? According to some people I don’t even have a heart!

Me: Same here!

My friend: Do you want me to take this round? I can get emoti0nal if I get ice cream for it.

Me: No, I’ll do it. I feel like crying for no reason anyways.

My friend: Maybe it should be both of us this time. Do you want Gregorio or can I have him?

[side note: Gregorio was the imaginary Italian boyfriend we created in middle school. Yeah, I know.]

Me: You can have Gregorio. I’ll sob about Paulo

[side note part deux: there is no story for Paulo. It’s just an attractive name]

My friend: Ok good, because I get confused. Yay! I’ll make a playlist and we can come up with a list of movies.

Me: Yay!!! Some new films, not just our stand-bys

My friend: I agree. How about Dirty Dancing?

Me: Yes! I’ve heard Barefoot in the Park is good.

My friend: Let’s add it to the list.

Me: What about Love Story?

My friend: I haven’t heard of it, but let’s give it a try.  After all, we are broken hearted hormonial teen girls

Me: True, true. It’s from the 70s. It may be on Netflix

My friend: I have a whole category of romantic movies on there.

Me: Bam! Good idea!

My friend: We will be spontaneous.

Me: But not about ice cream.

My friend: Of course not! That is sacred.

Me:  Amen!

My friend: Oh, and I bought some cookies for the party [another party, not the break-up, ice cream one], the closest to jammy dodgers I could find.

Me: Oooooh could we do fish fingers and custard???

[side note trois: both jammy dodgers and fish fingers and custard are foods from the British show Doctor Who, of which we are fans. This might explain the rest of this conversation.]

My friend: Ah! we need to!

Me:I think the custard is a weird British type though…

My friend:  Yeah it is. I don’t know where to get it.

Me: Um, there used to be a British tea shop in the area. Or we could just use American custard

My friend: No, I’m sure it tastes different.

Me: I’ve made custard from scratch before…

My friend: Then we should just do that, and while making it speak in English accents so it’d be British.

Me: Perfect!

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